“America Loves My Mom!” announced as campaign slogan for Jeb! Bush


Jeb-Bush-Announces-Mother-SizedMIAMI — T-shirts using the image of Jeb! Bush’s mother Barbara Bush are flying off the shelves today at $29.95 as the latest Texan presidential candidate moved quickly to remind Americans just how much they love his and George W’s mom.

Barbara Bush beer-can koozies are reportedly also selling well at $9.95, available exclusively at jebbushstore.com.


“Jeb! needed to distance himself right away from all the other Bush men who have had a whack or two as President,” said CNN’s Wolf Blitzer (not his real name) earlier today.

“Using his 90-year-old mother as the face for his campaign and fundraising might turn out to be the strong leadership message he’s been looking for.”

“I myself would not buy a Jeb! belt buckle even with the very lovable Barbara Bush on it but hey…if Jeb! thinks that’s what makes him President material, that’s his call.”


The “America Loves My Mom!” campaign makes absolutely no mention of Jeb! brother and former president George W. Bush but has flooded Facebook feeds with Jeb! merchandise for sale and has only a few short policy statements from Jeb! including “ISIS is bad”…”Hillary is a woman”…and “Immigrants. I’m all over ’em!”

Jeb! (62) is expected to be the GOP’s presidential front-runner to face off in 2016 against the Democrat’s Hillary Clinton (67) or Bernie Sanders (73) who has recently surged into the lead among 18- to 24-year olds and voters who don’t watch Fox News.

Barbara Bush told the Washington Post this morning that she is no longer dead-set against Jeb! becoming the third Bush President of the United States but the former First Lady admitted that she was unlikely to wear any clothing with her picture on it to support her second-oldest son’s dream.

Jeb! hoodies for young adults and black American voters are also available online for $49.95 but sales are reportedly sluggish.

Dan LeHomme
Reportering for The Lapine




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