Anger Grows as Canadians Told They Won’t Get to See the Super Bowl Halftime Show

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OTTAWA — The CRTC is being attacked today for their late announcement that the Super Bowl halftime show will not be broadcast in Canada and will be replaced by a live concert from Parliament Hill.

The completely unforeseen announcement came earlier this afternoon from James Moore, Minister of Defending Canadian Heritage, and gobsmacked media and the public.

“Canadian viewers will not see Katy Perry on Super Bowl Sunday,” a visibly nervous Moore said in his brief statement.

“Buuuuuut, they will be treated to a live 1/2 hour performance by Anne Murray, Nickelback, some French folksingers, and the Canadian Armed Forces Really Big Tanks Military Band.”

“Thank you…um…..I like kittens and puppies.”

Outrage grew quickly on social media with tens of thousands of posts blaming Prime Minister Stephen Harper, thousands blaming greedy-ass broadcaster CTV (A Division of Bell Media), and 7 people blaming themselves.

Moore refused to take questions from reporters but did say that Prime Minister Harper has not decided if he will perform.

Dan LeHomme
Reportering for The Lapine

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