Author: The Lapine

Terrorists De-Twittered by Twitter Twice

NAIROBI – Al-Shabaab, a cell of violent Islamists based out of Somalia, has been officially kicked off of twitter for the second time. Exasperated twitter spokesman James Barlow, was quick to confirm this. “Look,...

Toronto Police Fire Tasers at Deaf, Off-Leash Cocker Spaniel

TORONTO — Toronto Police fired five taser shots at an off-leash, nine-year-old cocker spaniel today after responding to a “dog roaming at large” call. The Police tasers “failed to make contact” and the dog,...