Boatload Of US Asylum Seekers


As a national and international debate about the 204 Americans who are seeking “humanitarian” refugee status in Canada grows, thousands have weighed in with their opinions.  The Pacific Queen, a tourist fishing boat, docked in St. John’s, Newfoundland and Labrador, after sailing north from Florida reportedly dodging U.S. Coast Guard vessels that at one pointed attempted to ram and board the ship.

The asylum seekers’ number dropped to 203 earlier today as one male was deported back to the United States to face charges related to an Occupy Miami protest where 43 others were arrested by Homeland Security agents.  A Globe and Mail Snap Survey shows that 48% of Canadians responded that the Americans should be deported.

Quotes from sources including Twitter, Facebook, CNN, FOX, the Globe and Mail, the Washington Post, and prepared media releases follow:

“Well bully for them.  No, I didn’t mean bully…I mean I was never a bully.”
Mitt Romney
Republican presidential candidate while campaigning in Minnesota

“I have spoken to President Obama and we are working towards a resolution.  NAFTA does not deal with the free trade of people.”
Prime Minister Stephen Harper

“Heck, one of those guys played for the Tampa Bay farm team…very mobile, good hands.  We’re in contact with him now.  They should get automatic Canadian citizenship.”
Brian Burker
Toronto Maple Leafs GM

“I have nothing to say to the media.”
Rob Ford
Toronto Mayor

“Oh they will love St. John’s.  Tell them to try the poutine.  It’s almost as good as in Montreal.”
Celine Dion

“Why would they want to leave Florida?  Ask them that.”
Jacques LaRue
Les Snowbirds

“There’s something fishy here. Give them some Tim Bits for the boat ride home.”

“I’d welcome them for a cuppa…”
Rita McNeil
Rita’s Tea Room, Big Pond, New Brunswick

“I love Canada.”
John Travolta

“Surveillance drones from Marblehead, Massachusetts, tracked the unidentified ship along the eastern seaboard and Coast Guard vessels attempted an intercept before the ship entered Canadian waters.  Air Force fighters were scrambled but it was determined that no threat was imminent.  We take this very seriously.”
U.S. Homeland Security media release

“Our understanding is that this group has expressed concerns about political and societal events occuring or potentially about to occur in the United States.  We also understand the ship was trying to reach St. John, New Brunswick, not St. John’s, Newfoundland and Labrador.”
David Jacobson
United States Ambassador to Canada

“Can’t blame them.  Canada has no guns, same-sex marriage, and very few Taco Bells.  Plus, they say ‘eh’ a lot and that’s kinda cute.”
Jon Stewart

“Punch a hole in their boat so its got a slow leak and push them towards Florida. Tell them if the hustle, they won’t sink.”

“They sailed all that way to a foreign country so a guy named Chuck can marry a guy named Guido?  So a gal named Tanya can marry a gal named Suzy-Lynn?  Nuts.”
Bill Haslam
Republican Governor of Tennessee

“I feel like this is somehow all our state’s fault.”
Beverly Perdue
Democratic Governor of North Carolina

“Great.  More a-holes to spy over my back fence.”
Rob Ford
Toronto Mayor
*A second comment reportedly made over lunch at Buffet Madness
“These citizens are certainly frustrated with the Republican agenda.  The Democratic Party and the President invite them to return home to join us in continuing to create a positive, inclusive America.”
White House media release

“We Do Not Accept American Express”
Sign posted yesterday in a St. John’s diner


Steve Boyd

Reporting From The Lapine