“God Hates Benches”
STARKE, FLORIDA – Westboro Baptist Church has changed their hate-filled slogan from “GOD HATES FAGS” to “GOD HATES BENCHES” as they began to picket the atheist “bench” monument unveiled in Starke, Florida. “Benches are...
Category: U.S.
Texas Bans Assless Chaps in Protest Over Same Sex Ruling
AUSTIN – On the heels of a Supreme Court ruling against the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA), Texas passed a bill intended to discourage “horny-dog homosexuals” from living in the state. They banned the...
Arizona Gun Buyers Offered Free Flag Tattoo
PHOENIX – Arizona Republican Governor Jan Brewer says her state will not destroy thousands of guns already bought by police in a “Get Guns Off The Street” weapons reduction program as planned. Instead the...
Jason Collins’ Stanford Roommate Guessed He Was a “Homosexualer”
WACO – Texas-born Billy W. Perry says he suspected that basketball player Jason Collins was into “gayism” when he roomed with him at Stanford University in 2000 from little hints such as Collins buying...
“Stop Timing My Bathroom Breaks” — 76-Year Old Walmart Greeter
PORT HURON – Standing all of 5′ 5″, Stan Lebowski blushes when he talks about being told he had to urinate less often and faster by his bosses at Walmart. “I don’t sprinkle as...
POTUS tells SCOTUS to BITEUS
HOUSTON – After repeatedly saying he had “evolved” on same-sex marriage and other issues, the President Of The United States (POTUS) Barack Obama told the Supreme Court Of The United States (SCOTUS) to Buy...
