Harper Slips Up — Says Words “Climate Change” for First Time Ever


harper-warns-terrorists-everywhereOTTAWA — A University of Toronto study released earlier this week found that Prime Minister Stephen Harper has never said the words “climate change” in public.

Until last night.

The P.M. seemed to surprise even himself when he went off script at a Conservative Party fundraiser and silenced his audience by actually saying “climate change”.

“The world faces many challenges today my fellow Canadians…Putin, marijuana, terrorists, climate change…” Harper said before coming to a complete halt with an almost shocked look on his face.

For several awkward seconds Harper stood silently, adjusting his glasses, and patting down his hair before completely changing the topic and moving on as if it never happened.


“…so then I looked Putin right in the eyes and I said “Get the hell out of Ukraine or else you little puke,” Harper carried on, shifting gears, confusing the audience, and adding new detail to the growing story of his recent confrontation with Putin in Australia.

The University of Toronto study found that Harper’s most commonly used phrases over the years include “oil sands development” with more than 4,300 references, “Justin Trudeau is a pothead” with 3,700 mentions, and “As your leader, I…” topping the list with so many references that the study team stopped counting.

The Prime Minister’s Chief Spokesman, Jason MacDonald, refused media questions following Harper’s seeming slip-up in his speech but issued an unrelated statement that the Prime Minister will “continue to fight for the best interests of middle-class Canadians by doubling down to eventually get the Keystone Pipeline approved and built.”

President Barack Obama reportedly tweeted congratulations to Harper for at least saying “climate change”.

“Baby steps, Stephen. Baby steps.”

Robin Steele
Reportering for The Lapine



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