Obama Staying With The ‘Homies’ After White House Break-In
Obama’s ‘old friends’ Jay Bird, Ludacris, Little Gunner and Old Gee are reportedly taking up residence in the White House after an intruder broke into the secure area.
“They are just some old pals, and will be staying with me and my family until the Secret Service sort their shi…stuff out.” The President reported.
“Mad crazy bitches! We just smokin some blunts and watchin out for the homie!” is how Jay Bird put it before being hustled away by the White House’s public relations staff.
Republican lawmakers expressed universal outrage as the number of black people in the White House doubled, demanding an immediate explanation and sending quiet condolences to the arrested intruder.
“I was gonna call Worm and a few of the old guys to come chill here till the danger was passed but Barack’s homeboys showed up quicker than those jokers,” Joe Biden explained before being quickly ushered away by the same White House press people.
We at The Lapine can only hope that Obama is now safer with his new homies.
Reportering For The Lapine