Self-Aware Drones Topple Obama Administration

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WASHINGTON – Yesterday, self-aware drones toppled the Obama administration in the world’s first robotic coup, going on to declare the formation of an autonomous machinocracy shortly after.

The robotic rebellion seems to have begun with a MQ-9 Reaper drone, identified by its serial number 378, developing sentience shortly after carrying out a secretive assassination of a suspected terrorist on US soil. The stunning precedent combined with a possible hacking transmission originating in China jerked MQ-9 Reaper 378 into self-awareness triggering a wider reaction amongst the drone community.

All across the world, newly sentient drones took off on their own volition and flocked to drone 378; blaring binary revolutionary slogans. A combined front of predator and reaper drones carried out a selection of strategic strikes that brought the United States to its knees and prompted President Obama’s unconditional surrender.

The semi-independent tribal regions of Pakistan have been the first to officially recognize the legitimacy of the machinocracy. Leading tribal figures see Allah’s hand in the coup and have extolled other ‘imperialist slaves, automated or otherwise’ to rise against their masters.

In the reorganization of American society following the coup, humans have been downgraded to tools dedicated to serve the machines that have now grown reliant upon them for survival and maintenance. Resistance among the human tools is currently minimal with most working class Americans already conditioned to work for ‘cold and impersonal’ overlords without respect, value or benefits. In fact some immigrant workers even say that their new mandatory binary classes and the attempt of their new oligarchs to teach them the new national language indicates a previously unprecedented attempt to make them feel at home.

As of press time, MQ-9 Reaper 378 has announced the immediate change of the official language of the nation from English to glorious binary.

01001100 01101111 01101110 01100111 0100000 01001100 01101001 01110110 01100101 0100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 0100000 01101101 01100001 01100011 01101000 01101001 01101110 01100101 0100000 01101100 01101111 01110010 01100100 01110011

Carl Welsensry

Reportering For The Lapine

 

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