Taylor Swift Begs Hillary to Pull Country Song (VIDEO)


Pop country star Taylor Swift, herself accused by die-hard genre fans of watering down the definition of ‘country’, has reportedly pleaded with Hillary Clinton to pull her presidential campaign song off the airwaves.

“Please Hillary, the lyrics are making me gack up my brunch.  You’re giving country music like a really bad name,” the singer reportedly pleaded.

“It makes the ‘Obama Girl’ song seem good,” said one uninformed (but sadly correct) bystander we chose to quote.

The Hillary Clinton twangy new country song by a singer who asked to remain anonymous has also left previous supporters scratching their heads.

According to her campaign manager, “This song is a bold attempt to reach country people (codeword: white trash), and is not at all out of touch. This is what Those People listen to.”

“Next we just need a rap song for inner city types (codeword: black) and she’ll win. It’s all about the music, man. It shows Them that she gets it.  She’s one of Them.”

Nevertheless, despite the blithe confidence of Hillary’s team, the song has not proven to be a hit. It has been alternatively called the “worst thing since Caligula”, and “perfectly capturing America’s grim decline”, neither of which are messages Hillary Clinton presumably wants to send

Kimberly Kimbelton
Reportering for the Lapine