U.S. Embassy in Ebola Should be Evacuated — Sarah Palin
WASHINGTON — Former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin turned her attention span to international affairs on The Sarah Palin Channel Starring Sarah Palin earlier today.
“First let me say that some of my best friends are Ebolan and I’m saddened by recent events,” Palin told her viewing audience mostly tuning in from Ohio and Arizona.
“And I promise you that America will help all those poor starving school girls who were kidnapped after the earthquake and flooding, and are now getting bombed in their sleep by Hummus extremists who shot down a plane full of Dutch people.”
“But I tell you this America…we need to learn from Benghazi.”
Palin went on to say that the U.S. should immediately “man up” the security at the “Ebolan Embassy” or “get the heck outta there.”
After informing her viewers that “there are actually some white people in Africa”, Palin seemed to be saying that President Obama is a Muslim and has been a pants-peeing sissy with terrorists.
“President Obama is a Muslim and has been a pants-peeing sissy with terrorists” were her exact words.
Palin also touched on other important U.S. foreign diplomatic affairs:
– On Russian President Vladimir Putin — “Saggy gut. I could take him.”
– On Iraq — “Gotta be honest here…I get Iraq and Iran mixed up all the time. hahaha.”
– On Israel/Gaza — “I got a really bad sunburn in Tel Aviv once.”
– On Pope Francis — “Man, he’s a short little celibating pickle ain’t he?
Palin said multiple times throughout the one-hour unscripted broadcast that all the world’s current problems can be traced back to “la-la-land liberal atheists”, Muslims, and other Muslims.
“Obama sleeps every night in one of those white robey things that’re all the Muslim fashion rage…and he just sits there every day while Muslims are churning out kids and sending them across the Mexican border as fast as they can make ’em.”
“Sushi? Sunni? I don’t know which kind of Muslim he is…but Obama’s one of them for sure.”
Reportering for The Lapine