Utah to Allow Same-Sex Marriage between Women — Not between Men


SALT LAKE CITY — Utah Governor Gary Herbert (R) announced today that the state legislature has reached a compromise on the issue of same-sex marriage that will allow women to marry women but make it illegal for men to marry men.

“The image of two women marrying and doing…things…isn’t so bad when you actually stop and picture it in your mind,” Herbert told the Salt Lake Tribune and MSNBC following the release of the proposed new law.

“The image of two men together…well, yeah, um, not a pretty picture.”

The largely conservative state has been grappling with the issue since a December, 2013, District Court ruling made same-sex marriages legal and hundreds of couples raced to take their vows. Those same-sex marriages were put in limbo on January 6th of this year however when the Supreme Court granted a stay while the 10th Circuit Court of Appeal considers a legal challenge by Republican Attorney General Sean D. Reyes.

“Marriage between two people with the same plumbing is not the Utah way,” said Reyes at the time of announcing the appeal early in January.

Speaking on Fox & Friends this morning, Reyes told host Elisabeth Hasselbeck that he has come around to the idea of women marrying but “just cannot fathom two men marrying, holding hands, kissing and that other stuff.”

Both Reyes and Governor Herbert said they see this as a compromise that will be acceptable to the voting public.

“Personally, I think that the people of the great State of Utah are open minded about stuff like this whole gal-gal thing,” said Governor Herbert.

“We move with the times. We get on Pinterest just like everyone else. And allowing women to marry is something I think we can all find it in our hearts to live with.”

“A guy marrying a guy? Nope. And ewwww.”

William Yum
Reportering for The Lapine



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