White House Tells Harper to “Mind His Own Beeswax”, “Tap the Sap of His Own Maple Tree”


WASHINGTON — White House Press Secretary Jay Carney took a diplomatic jab at Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper today over his “repeated and bossy advice giving” to the U.S.

“Prime Minister Harper needs to mind his own beeswax, tend to his own knitting, tap the sap of his own Maple tree…those are Canadian sayings aren’t they?” an annoyed Carney told media at a backgrounder session earlier today.

Carney was responding to a question from the Washington Post about Harper’s recent comments that he and Canada “will not take NO for an answer” on the pending Keystone Pipeline decision.

“We do not comment on Prime Minister Harper’s annual proroguing of Parliament and certainly do feel that Mr. Harper needs to restrict his comments to Canadian affairs or his new ice hockey book,” said Carney.

Following New York Times front-page coverage of Harper’s unusually aggressive Keystone Pipeline comments, U.S. media reporting on the PM has increased dramatically and Harper has become unusually vocal about the U.S. shutdown, the looming debt crisis, and about the time President Obama wore a “gaudy paisley” bow tie to a state dinner in 2011.

The L.A. Times quoted Harper on the weekend as saying that Texas Senator Cruz would “make a great addition to the Canadian Senate” if the Canadian-born Republican ever decided to return to Canada.

“Prime Minister Harper has started posing as an elderly statesmen with the media recently and certainly has begun telling us how we should do pretty much everything. I have seen Mr. Harper talk down to the President like he’s a child who has put his Thomas the Train sneakers on the wrong feet,” said Carney.

The Prime Minister’s Office declined to comment on Carney’s statements.

“It was sort of entertainingly naive at first,” Carney said to the White House press corps. “But now, frankly, it’s gotten to the point that we just forward his phone calls to the White House Gift Shop.”


Dan L’Homme
Reportering for The Lapine



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